NFL Week 16 Picks and Power Rankings

Quick question before we start this week’s nonsense: Are there any eggnog fans out there?

I’ve recently found that eggnog has turned into the candy corn of the Christmas season. There are people that really love it – like my wife – and there are people that can’t stand it, like seemingly most of the population.

I’m good with eggnog, as long as whiskey is involved. Or rum. Hell, I’d take vodka. Adding booze to anything will get my attention. Especially during a Rams game, because lord knows you need alcohol to watch a team not score for 60 minutes.

Is that bad? It can’t be good, right?

(You can discuss this on the BSL Board here.)

Anyway, let’s move on before this turns into an AA meeting.

Presenting this week’s Playoff Contender Power Rankings:

 1. Patriots (1) – They struggled offensively, but still got a win on the road. New England is pretty much a lock to reach the Super Bowl. Give me one team that can beat the Patriots in Foxborough. I’ll wait …

 2. Cowboys (2) – Anyone else want to doubt Dak Prescott now? Going 32 of 36 for 279 yards and zero interceptions in a win over the red-hot Buccaneers will shut the mouths of even the most diabolical hater.

 3. Raiders (4) – The Silver and Black got another close win, this time over the Chargers. However, they need to send some complimentary wine to the Titans for beating the Chiefs. Now, the Raiders are back to being a game up in the division at 11-3 and are primed to get that coveted first-round bye in the playoffs.

 4. Chiefs (3) – Tough loss at home, but they’re still in a good place when it comes to the postseason.

 5. Giants (5) – It’s true that Big Blue seem to be getting the bounces going their way this season, but you can’t doubt their defense’s performance in a strong home win over the Lions.

 6. Seahawks (7) – Richard Sherman is getting all the wrong kinds of attention lately with his verbal antics, but this team is too experienced to ever be taken lightly. With their Thursday win over the dump-truck Rams, they clinched their fifth consecutive playoff appearance. Kudos to what Pete Carroll has built in Seattle.

 7. Falcons (9) – Defensive questions? Yes. Doubts about their ability to actually reach a Super Bowl? Sure. But I couldn’t be higher about this team right now as that offense is making opposing defenses look silly. Where’s the MVP love for Matt Ryan?

 8. Dolphins (13) – When backup QB Matt Moore can throw just 18 times, but have four of his throws go for touchdowns, you’re a team in good shape.

 9. Steelers (11) – Pittsburgh is currently riding a five-game winning streak, its longest since 2009.

 10. Lions (6) – It’s not just that Detroit laid an egg in Week 15 in New York, it’s that Green Bay is hot on the Lions’ heels. Matthew Stafford and Co. could realistically get knocked out of the playoff race.

 11. Packers (16) – You just know the Packers are going to get past the gagging Lions and win the division. You. Just. Know. It.

 12. Titans (14) – What a quality win on the road in Kansas City, but the job is not done. The Titans have identical 8-6 records with division-leading Houston and I think they’ll be the team to win the crown.

 13. Buccaneers (8) – They really needed a win in Dallas, but fell short. But all is not lost, because if they win out and get some help from Detroit, the Bucs can still get in.

 14. Ravens (15) – I don’t think they’ll make the postseason, but they’ve got a shot. And a matchup with the Steelers looming.

 15. Texans (17) – I’m still not fond of this team, but at least I don’t hate them anymore. Taking Brock Osweiler out of the starting lineup will do that to you. #Savage2016

 16. Redskins (12) – That was a truly uninspired effort against Carolina. How that happened, I have no idea.

 17. Broncos (19) – This team is like the patient in the medical drama who comes into the emergency room with severe wounds. And one doctor looks at another and slowly shakes his head. This one isn’t going to make it.

 18. Colts (n/a) – Well, they still technically have a shot, right? But we all know the truth. Poor Andrew Luck.

 19. Vikings – Ewww.

 Honorable mentions: Saints, Panthers, Bills.

Make golf plans: Cardinals, Eagles, Rams, Bears, 49ers, Chargers, Jets, Jaguars, Browns, Bengals.

WEEK 16

4 SEXY MATCHUPS

Ravens at Steelers

It’s real simple: Pittsburgh wins and it punches a ticket to the playoffs. The Steelers have been rushing the passer and protecting their own very well during this win streak and while the Ravens’ front is dangerous, I don’t think it will be enough. Look for the Black and Gold to wrap it up at home.

Pick: Steelers

Lions at Cowboys

Sure, this game seems sexy on the surface, but we all know how this is going to end, right? The Cowboys will control the line of scrimmage and dominate time of possession. The Lions will put up some points and the score may end up close, but come on. We’ve seen this movie before.

Pick: Cowboys

Broncos at Chiefs

Denver is circling the drain. And the Chiefs are going to wash them down all the way. Do you think Peyton Manning gets a little pleasure of seeing this team miss the playoffs in the first season without him? I know I would be that petty. But hey, that’s me.

Pick: Chiefs

Vikings at Packers

Aaron Rodgers needs to patent “R-E-L-A-X”. He’ll make a fortune with it. I’m calling my shot now: The Packers will make the playoffs. They’ll win this week and will take down Detroit in the season finale.

Pick: Packers

9 MATCHUPS THAT ARE MILDLY INTERESTING

Giants at Eagles: There’s nothing like seeing these two teams battle in Philadelphia. Just to see the vitriol between the two fan bases. I’m going with Big Blue.

Pick: Giants

Dolphins at Bills: Rex Ryan is apparently about to be kicked out the door in Buffalo, and this game could be the final nail in his coaching coffin. But I don’t know, this is just the type of game Rex wins. I think he’ll get it done.

Pick: Bills

Titans at Jaguars: Look for the Jags to come through with a lot of emotion early to honor the memory of their fired head coach. But we all know that won’t be enough to carry the day.

Pick: Titans

Falcons at Panthers: Would have been nice if the Panthers had actually kept Josh Norman. But they didn’t, so I’m calling for the Falcons to air it out all day and get a measure of revenge for last year’s bad 38-0 loss in Carolina.

Pick: Falcons

Redskins at Bears: Here’s hoping the Redskins can pick themselves up off the ground after falling on their face. However, it might be too late as far as the playoffs are concerned.

Pick: Redskins

Chargers at Browns: I really hope Cleveland doesn’t finish 0-16. This is their last real chance to get a win. I’m really pulling for them. So much so, that I’m doing something unwise …

Pick: Browns

Colts at Raiders: Indy is fighting to stay in the playoff hunt, but this will be the final Street Fighter death blow.

Pick: Raiders

Buccaneers at Saints: You never know which Saints team you’re going to get from week to week. I think we’ll get the bad one in this matchup.

Pick: Buccaneers

Bengals at Texans: The Tom Savage era officially begins this week. And I think it’ll be a positive one.

Pick: Texans

3 MATCHUPS THAT ARE A COMPLETE WASTE OF TIME

Jets at Patriots – Pick: Patriots

Cardinals at Seahawks – Pick: Seahawks

49ers at Rams – Pick: Rams