Week 3, Ravens Fast Five: All Hail Justin Tucker

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1. Start prepping the Justin Tucker Hall of Fame bust.

People can crap on kickers all they want, and if they aren’t Ravens fans, I get it. You have your physical freaks on both sides of the ball, battling, fighting tooth and nail, making play after play, only for a 60-minute game to be decided by a guy who may stand less than six-feet tall, may weigh less than 200 pounds. A guy who hasn’t taken the field but a few times all day, hardly has any pads on. If they aren’t Justin Tucker, they probably are worthy of casting aside the first time they cost your team in a clutch situation.

JUSTIN TUCKER MADE A 66-YARD, NFL RECORD BREAKING FIELD GOAL TO WIN THE GAME! HE’S THE MOST ACCURATE KICKER IN NFL HISOTRY! IT WASN’T WIND AIDED OR IN THE THIN AIR OF DENVER. GIVE HIM THE RESPECT HE’S DUE!

I’m screaming it because when I flipped over to the FOX post game coverage, all they did was mentioned that the Ravens “squeaked out a win” after THE LIONS converted a field goal in the final minutes of the game. I’m sorry. Does Carrie Bradshaw and the FOX crew not have 27 televisions in studio, tablets propped up in front of them, producers in their earpieces telling them that Justin Tucker won the game by setting a new NFL Record?

After a day of Craig Gumbel mispronouncing seemingly every player’s name on the field, Including Tucker, whom he called Justin Turner at one point, then no one recognizing Tucker’s accomplishment, I had had enough.

I personally hate the announcer jinx. It’s silly, call me superstitious. Instead of talking about how many certain types of field goals Tucker has made in a row, since he did in fact miss from 49-yards earlier in the game, how about from now on, just refer to Tucker in the following manner when he trots his golden boots out onto the field so no one forgets anymore.

“Here comes future Hall of Famer Justin Tucker, to attempt a (x)-yard field goal/extra point.”

Warning: If you drink the purple Kool-Aid, stop reading here.

2. The Ravens deserve to be 0-3.

Do you realize how close to reality 0-3 is? Does anyone realize how close to sharing the same record as the Jets, Jaguars, Giants, and the week 5 opponent, the Colts, really is? It’s a forced fumble and recovery last week, and an NFL record field goal, aided by a lucky bounce off the crossbar away.

It’s as if the Ravens were humbled by the week 1 loss in Vegas, they knew they had to be better in week 2 against the AFC Champion favorite Chiefs. To their credit, the coaching staff pulled the right strings, and got the best outcome, but still, losing was in the cards despite a miracle produced by Odafe Oweh. Then, the Ravens riding the high after beating “the best”, did they feel like they could cake walk against anyone, and come into lowly Detroit expecting a win rather than earning it?

Justin Tucker saved their behinds with an NFL record 66-yard kick, that shouldn’t have been anyway since no referees were apparently watching the play clock. I know there is a tiny bit of leeway, as referees must see the play clock hit zero, then glance to the see if the ball is snapped. It’s a hell of a long glance as my stopwatch upon re-watch says they Ravens got 1.9 seconds of leeway, should have made it a 71-yard attempt after the penalty, meaning the Ravens either were not attempting that, or Tucker wasn’t making it as 66 off the crossbar might signify his long. He said he was coming up short from 65 in warmups.

At least John Harbaugh walked across the field to meet Dan Campbell with the demeanor that Campbell’s team deserved to win. While the Ravens players celebrated like they actually did something. Only one player did anything.

Approach practices this week like you are 0-3 and heading to 3-0 Denver. You are two miracles shy of 0-3 versus 2-1 anyway. Be humble.

3. He’s Marquise Brown. “Hollywood” Brown wouldn’t drop balls.

I’ve subtly referred to Marquise Brown by legal name over the last couple years amid cases of the drops, and other boneheaded ideas. Like tweeting out his displeasure of the number of targets he receives. I call him by legal name maybe 75% of the time.

I save the nickname for “Hollywood” for when it’s deserved. Like last week when he had several big plays in a big-time game. It’s not just him. It’s anyone with a nickname. I’m not going to use terms like “Action Jackson” or “Lamar-velous” when you come out in week 1 thinking you’re “all-that” with your golden cleats, only to fumble the ball three times, twice in crucial situations.

Here’s a question? Since many Ravens fans are also Orioles fans, when is the last time anyone referred to Chris Davis as “Crush”?

I’ve been subtle about it, and friends of mine brought it up in the group chat yesterday. He has to earn the “Hollywood” moniker back after leaving his hands in Baltimore this week. He is almost single handedly why the Ravens didn’t have a 20-point halftime lead and the Lions got it in their head that they had a chance. The Ravens got all out of sorts after halftime.

4. If you can figure out who the Ravens are, please, tell us.

I mean, seriously, who is this team? The offensive line can’t block a marching band with a brick wall in week 1, then it’s as if wild bulls in Pamplona weren’t penetrating them in week 2. The Ravens coaches made proper adjustments to beat the Chiefs in week 2, but whatever game plan they brought to Detroit didn’t seem to include an abundance of their strength, running the football. The Lions pass defense has been shredded all year, but who knew the Ravens receivers wouldn’t bring their hands? Lamar Jackson looks like an MVP on some drives. Then is careless with the football on others. In all three games so far we’ve seen the good and the bad from Jackson, in some order that seems to help determine games.

Mistake free Jackson for 60 minutes would be a welcome sight.

Wondering is beating the Chiefs was less on the Ravens on more on the Chiefs weaknesses. Kansas City has lost three of their last four games now going back to last season. How on earth do you beat the Chiefs, but basically, lose, to Detroit?

I closed last weeks fast five by saying if you can beat the Chiefs, you can beat anyone. Maybe that’s a half truth, because it still means you can lose to anyone too.

5. Find the running game on your way to Denver

Next week the Ravens continue their road trip heading up to the thin air of Denver to square off with the 3-0 Broncos. Without getting too much into the Xs and Os, it seems like a matchup that should favor the Ravens, only if they bring the running game. A few of those 14 play drives that eat up eight minutes or more should have the Denver defense begging for oxygen.

The Broncos sport a talented secondary, so it’s even more important to protect the football, and Lamar Jackson to stop dating Marquise Brown for a week. He’s got to have eyes for his other receivers sometimes. Mark Andrews is attractive. Does Devin Duvernay have to be 15 yards wide open to get your attention?

The Ravens need to remember where they butter their bread. There were 35 drop backs, and 22 rushes against Detroit. I’ll have to re-watch to see how many of Lamar Jackson’s seven rushes were pass plays that he scrambled on. Probably closer to 37-40 passes and 16-20 runs. That is not your desired ratio based on the team’s strengths. Flip those numbers next week, and the weeks to come please.